"Supposed to"

I'm "supposed to" be packing right now. I'm "supposed to" be washing my dishes. I'm "supposed to" be working out. I'm "supposed to" be picking up my apartment. Not exactly the current state of affairs. Instead, I am listening to Friends in the background as I drink wine and create a Blog. A fairly Marissa moment, to say the least.

Now that I think about it---I'm "supposed to" be living in Texas near my family. I'm "supposed to" be partying it up like 25 year olds in LA. I'm "supposed to" be putting together a resume to begin submitting to potential employers. I'm "supposed to" be..... Says who? It's not where I am tonight, today, right now.

On the topic of "supposed to"..... 27-year olds aren't "supposed to" get breast cancer. 25 year old fiancee's dads are not "supposed to" die 2 months before walking their daughters down the aisle. Marriages are not "supposed to" end. Hearts are not "supposed to" break. Tears are not "supposed to" fall. ....... In the eternal sense, that's true. But God's redemption of the earth is closer to a refiner's fire that uses valleys and trials for his glory than a sweet, smooth road filled with cotton candy and gumdrops all the way to the golden gates. God gives us a deep, inherent awareness of how things are "supposed to" be....only so that we will look to him for our salvation from the sin and destruction we have brought upon ourselves. Maybe we just need to realize that while on Earth....things are exactly how they are "supposed to" be....even though they are not as God desires.

Rainbows are supposed to be circles, for that matter.